Tuesday, October 2, 2007
10/2/2007
In a great joy of a mood and with good mood comes energy and another journal entry. I've been bummed out lately but today I got a lot of mail! Yeah! I got a letter form Dad and not only did he write but also sent money (personal check) so I can't have it, but it is the thought that counts. He says he is going to start sending $25/month which would ease my condition up here tremendously! More importantly he filled out the visitation paperwork which means he can now visit me if he wants! Good Lord, how I miss him and would love to see him. On top of all that I received a letter and pictures form Mom. There was some beautiful shots of the bay area, great shots of my brother and mom, and some depressingly similar shots of Alcatraz. Weird that the tiered living cells look so similar, but maybe all prisons look like that, I wouldn't know. Mom says she will be here this weekend and I that's awesome! Visits and mail really lift my spirits. On top of that family letters mom also put in $20 in my account. Such a trivial amount in the real world (outside) but it means so much to me in that it takes me over 3 weeks of work to make that amount. It was good to hear from Mom, I was worried she was mad at me. I wrote her almost 2 months ago and was doing some major venting about this place and how they denied me some books she sent me. Looking back it might have come across like I was upset at her, which wasn't the case at all. I'll apologize in person this weekend. Other than the mail, I found out today that I get to drink *real* coffee at my new job starting next week. So much better than the freeze-dried stuff. With mom visiting and an inmate friend of mine making a cream-cheese cake with the cream cheese I've been giving him from my breakfast, this might be a good weekend. Well my show (Reaper) is starting soon. Write later.
Monday, October 1, 2007
10/1/2007
Well this is the first day of writing in my journal. I will try to do it everyday no matter how boring. Tired today, I couldn't seem to get awake no matter how much coffee I drank. Work at braille was the usual. Boring and the shop boss is a complete tool. Pat (boss) made a point to tell everyone that they "have" to wear their tan shirts starting Oct 1 (today). Everyone has seen it posted for the last week. He made a point to search me and pat me down before lunch. I think he suspects that I'm going to take things from the shop since it is my last week there. He's right. I might as well make some can-cash (aka tokens) selling some stuff. Had Buddhist study group tonight. if you can call it that. It has been just me and another inmate for the last 3 months. The last 3 weeks we haven't even meditated because the Muslims are in our usual spot. I left early and returned to my cell and watched TV. Chuck (funny show), Heros, Journeyman, and Animonday. I would like ot sleep but the natives are restless tonight. Half are watching baseball and the other half is listening to the football game. Anytime anything, and I mean *anything* happens in the game everybody yells and ponds their lockers. It's very loud. Well I better try to get some rest. I hope tomorrow i get some mail. It is really the only part I look forward to int he day (mail pass out). Well that and visits, but I only seem to get them on the weekends.
Goodnight.
Goodnight.
Thursday, May 24, 2007
Liberation Prison Project [LPP] 5-24-2007
Snow Lion Publications forwarded your letter to us; we handle all their requests from people in prison. Thank you for telling us a little bit about yourself. We are glad to hear that you are interested in Buddhism and are happy to support you in a daily schedule of practice and study. How fantastic you are putting so much effort into your meditation in such difficult circumstances.
We are sending you some books and our newsletter today, including How to Meditate, in a separate package. Read them and see what you think. We can't send you a mala at this time, but don't worry. When you've been practicing a little while and know some mantras, we may be able to help.
In your letter you mentioned that your group is practicing Buddhist meditation, how wonderful! If your group is interested, we'd also be happy to provide them with support and materials. In order to do this I have a few questions that will help us understand how we can best be of service to you. Do you have a teacher guiding the group, or would you like one to write to for advice? Are you the representative for the group? What materials do you already have? What topics and readings have you been studying?
Meanwhile, let me tell you and your friends a little more about Buddhism. You can say it is a philosophy and it is also psychology: it is very much about the human mind: how it functions, how and why we experience suffering and happiness, and most certainly about how to become very familiar with the workings of our mind and how to change ourselves for the better.
The essence of Buddhism is this: that we all possess the innate potential to develop our positive qualities and to decrease our unhappy states of minds, and on the basis of this to be of benefit to others. Buddha has this nice analogy: a bird needs two wings: wisdom and compassion. By working on ourselves, becoming less neurotic and angry and depressed and fearful, we ourselves thus become more wise and content; and then, on the basis of that, we can develop empathy and compassion for others and be more skillful at helping the world become a better person.
Buddha says that the main causes of happiness and suffering are within ourselves, not coming from the outside world, which is how we think now. This doesn't mean that things don't affect us from the outside - they most certainty do. People harm us and help us. Buddha's view is that if we worked more on our own minds - on the very way we think and feel about the situations and the people -we can develop incredible levels of contentment and satisfaction and the other positive states of mind: kindness, generosity, wisdom, patience, etc.
So, the purpose of Buddhist practice - meditation, studying Buddha's views about the world, the mind, etc. - is to do this job: develop our positive qualities and decrease our negative. Then, whatever happens to us from the outside world will have less and less impact on us. This doesn't mean we become aloof and uncaring; it means we give up the neurotic attachment that believes that happiness comes from the outside and therefore the anger that comes when we don't get what we want, and so forth.
Easy words to say, but hard to do! Nevertheless possible.
The basis of our success is discipline - and lots of patience with ourselves! We need to learn to harness this uncontrolled mind of ours and to learn new habits. And this is the hard part, isn't it? It's like developing new muscles in the body, except here we're talking about developing new ways of thinking and feeling, new ways of responding. We've tried to change everything else - people, things, situations - all in the determined hope to get what we want (satisfaction, happiness etc.), and we still stay dissatisfied, right?
Meditation plays an important role in Buddhist practice. They are skillful techniques, basically, for learning to work with our minds. In the book How to Meditate you will see various techniques.
As for how to set up a schedule of practice and study: read the following and think about it, putting into practice any or all of it. It's up to you. There's no need to push.
MORNING: It's good to start our practice from the moment we wake up. As soon as you wake up, immediately recall how lucky you are that you are still alive. We just take it for granted, but things change all the time when we least expect it. Death can and really does happen at any time, doesn't it? Then think (something like this, in your own words): May I make the most of today, using every moment to develop my own qualities and to benefit others, even in my thoughts. May I do whatever I am going to do or say or think today for the sake of every living being.
When you get out of bed, you could do three prostrations. (Once you've read How to Meditate and thought about it, we will tell you more about this practice.)
Anyway, making your first thoughts Dharma thoughts, your first words Dharma words and your first action a Dharma action, this is excellent. ("Dharma" roughly means "spiritual" or "positive.")
inert it is good to make your offerings on your altar. (Again, we will let you Know about this later.)
Prostrations, making offerings, altars etc., are all optional: it's entirely up to the individual to decide what practices they do and don't want to do.
First, though, as it says in the teachings, you should "clean your room." The attitude to have is that you're preparing for the Buddha, as if he were coming to visit you. Make you area nice: you should feel that you are cleaning up your attachment, anger etc.. Then you could do some meditation. On page 34 of How to Meditate it explains how to sit properly. Important is to be comfortable, but to have your back straight.
Start with a motivation again: I am sitting here because I want to subdue my own mind so that I can develop my own marvelous potential and eventually become a Buddha for the sake of every living being. Then you can do some breathing meditation (page 44). Then try one of the other meditations such as on the Buddha (page 126).
Don't have too many expectations of yourself! Just relax, read through the practices, and gradually you'll become familiar with them. And take it slowly, one step at a time.
DURING THE DAY: During the day or whenever you can it is excellent to study some of Buddha's teachings in the books we've sent you, really thinking about its meaning, taking notes, pointing out questions, etc.
When you eat or drink you can offer it to the "Three Jewels," that is, the Buddha, Dharma and Sangha (your spiritual friends). Also imagine that you are offering it to all the beings on this earth and everywhere by reciting the following prayer:
Basically, the process of purification involves four steps (think of them as the four "Rs"): the first is Regret: to truly regret all harm you have ever done to any living being since beginningless time - and you can be specific about particular actions or particular habitual delusions, whatever.
The second is the Power of Reliance (this comes first in How to Meditate; either way
is okay). You turn to the Buddha as the source to your purification; who else can help me? You also feel compassion for all living beings, whom you have harmed.
The third is the Power of the Remedy the actual practice, the medicine. Here you do the visualization, as it's explained.
Finally there is the Power of Resolve: you make a firm determination not to harm others again, as much as possible to refrain from delusions again. That's the process of purification. Very logical.
In this way you start your day with Dharma, you make as much of your day Dharma, and you finish with Dharma.
Doing just the study on its own is not enough, and doing just the meditations on their own is not enough; we need both.
Our motivation is important, so, before you do your practice or your studies, think: I'm going to do this so that I can develop my own potential and be of benefit to others, eventually becoming a Buddha.
This is an ideal day of practice and study. Read through it carefully, and whatever makes sense to you, adopt it; otherwise just leave it. It's up to you. An ideal practice has the components of 1. creating positive energy, or merit, and 2. purification, and this is fulfilled by all of the above.
And, again, take it easy. Don't push, don't expect too much of yourself.
Once you've tried the meditations and read the books, if you feel this practice is right for you, we are happy to offer our services and guide you further. Please write to me again if you have any questions or want more advice. I am happy to help.
I send you many prayers,
Robina
We are sending you some books and our newsletter today, including How to Meditate, in a separate package. Read them and see what you think. We can't send you a mala at this time, but don't worry. When you've been practicing a little while and know some mantras, we may be able to help.
In your letter you mentioned that your group is practicing Buddhist meditation, how wonderful! If your group is interested, we'd also be happy to provide them with support and materials. In order to do this I have a few questions that will help us understand how we can best be of service to you. Do you have a teacher guiding the group, or would you like one to write to for advice? Are you the representative for the group? What materials do you already have? What topics and readings have you been studying?
Meanwhile, let me tell you and your friends a little more about Buddhism. You can say it is a philosophy and it is also psychology: it is very much about the human mind: how it functions, how and why we experience suffering and happiness, and most certainly about how to become very familiar with the workings of our mind and how to change ourselves for the better.
The essence of Buddhism is this: that we all possess the innate potential to develop our positive qualities and to decrease our unhappy states of minds, and on the basis of this to be of benefit to others. Buddha has this nice analogy: a bird needs two wings: wisdom and compassion. By working on ourselves, becoming less neurotic and angry and depressed and fearful, we ourselves thus become more wise and content; and then, on the basis of that, we can develop empathy and compassion for others and be more skillful at helping the world become a better person.
Buddha says that the main causes of happiness and suffering are within ourselves, not coming from the outside world, which is how we think now. This doesn't mean that things don't affect us from the outside - they most certainty do. People harm us and help us. Buddha's view is that if we worked more on our own minds - on the very way we think and feel about the situations and the people -we can develop incredible levels of contentment and satisfaction and the other positive states of mind: kindness, generosity, wisdom, patience, etc.
So, the purpose of Buddhist practice - meditation, studying Buddha's views about the world, the mind, etc. - is to do this job: develop our positive qualities and decrease our negative. Then, whatever happens to us from the outside world will have less and less impact on us. This doesn't mean we become aloof and uncaring; it means we give up the neurotic attachment that believes that happiness comes from the outside and therefore the anger that comes when we don't get what we want, and so forth.
Easy words to say, but hard to do! Nevertheless possible.
The basis of our success is discipline - and lots of patience with ourselves! We need to learn to harness this uncontrolled mind of ours and to learn new habits. And this is the hard part, isn't it? It's like developing new muscles in the body, except here we're talking about developing new ways of thinking and feeling, new ways of responding. We've tried to change everything else - people, things, situations - all in the determined hope to get what we want (satisfaction, happiness etc.), and we still stay dissatisfied, right?
Meditation plays an important role in Buddhist practice. They are skillful techniques, basically, for learning to work with our minds. In the book How to Meditate you will see various techniques.
As for how to set up a schedule of practice and study: read the following and think about it, putting into practice any or all of it. It's up to you. There's no need to push.
MORNING: It's good to start our practice from the moment we wake up. As soon as you wake up, immediately recall how lucky you are that you are still alive. We just take it for granted, but things change all the time when we least expect it. Death can and really does happen at any time, doesn't it? Then think (something like this, in your own words): May I make the most of today, using every moment to develop my own qualities and to benefit others, even in my thoughts. May I do whatever I am going to do or say or think today for the sake of every living being.
When you get out of bed, you could do three prostrations. (Once you've read How to Meditate and thought about it, we will tell you more about this practice.)
Anyway, making your first thoughts Dharma thoughts, your first words Dharma words and your first action a Dharma action, this is excellent. ("Dharma" roughly means "spiritual" or "positive.")
inert it is good to make your offerings on your altar. (Again, we will let you Know about this later.)
Prostrations, making offerings, altars etc., are all optional: it's entirely up to the individual to decide what practices they do and don't want to do.
First, though, as it says in the teachings, you should "clean your room." The attitude to have is that you're preparing for the Buddha, as if he were coming to visit you. Make you area nice: you should feel that you are cleaning up your attachment, anger etc.. Then you could do some meditation. On page 34 of How to Meditate it explains how to sit properly. Important is to be comfortable, but to have your back straight.
Start with a motivation again: I am sitting here because I want to subdue my own mind so that I can develop my own marvelous potential and eventually become a Buddha for the sake of every living being. Then you can do some breathing meditation (page 44). Then try one of the other meditations such as on the Buddha (page 126).
Don't have too many expectations of yourself! Just relax, read through the practices, and gradually you'll become familiar with them. And take it slowly, one step at a time.
DURING THE DAY: During the day or whenever you can it is excellent to study some of Buddha's teachings in the books we've sent you, really thinking about its meaning, taking notes, pointing out questions, etc.
When you eat or drink you can offer it to the "Three Jewels," that is, the Buddha, Dharma and Sangha (your spiritual friends). Also imagine that you are offering it to all the beings on this earth and everywhere by reciting the following prayer:
May we and those around us, in all future lives,NIGHT: At night you do some purification meditation: (try out the meditation on page 178). This is excellent. It incorporates what are called the Four Opponent Powers.
Never be separated from the Three Jewels,
Continuously make offerings to the Three Jewels.
And enter the inspiration of the Three Jewels.
Basically, the process of purification involves four steps (think of them as the four "Rs"): the first is Regret: to truly regret all harm you have ever done to any living being since beginningless time - and you can be specific about particular actions or particular habitual delusions, whatever.
The second is the Power of Reliance (this comes first in How to Meditate; either way
is okay). You turn to the Buddha as the source to your purification; who else can help me? You also feel compassion for all living beings, whom you have harmed.
The third is the Power of the Remedy the actual practice, the medicine. Here you do the visualization, as it's explained.
Finally there is the Power of Resolve: you make a firm determination not to harm others again, as much as possible to refrain from delusions again. That's the process of purification. Very logical.
In this way you start your day with Dharma, you make as much of your day Dharma, and you finish with Dharma.
Doing just the study on its own is not enough, and doing just the meditations on their own is not enough; we need both.
Our motivation is important, so, before you do your practice or your studies, think: I'm going to do this so that I can develop my own potential and be of benefit to others, eventually becoming a Buddha.
This is an ideal day of practice and study. Read through it carefully, and whatever makes sense to you, adopt it; otherwise just leave it. It's up to you. An ideal practice has the components of 1. creating positive energy, or merit, and 2. purification, and this is fulfilled by all of the above.
And, again, take it easy. Don't push, don't expect too much of yourself.
Once you've tried the meditations and read the books, if you feel this practice is right for you, we are happy to offer our services and guide you further. Please write to me again if you have any questions or want more advice. I am happy to help.
I send you many prayers,
Robina
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